Ashton-Under-Slime

Do you ever have one of those days? well, I think I did yesterday......

It started at midday when I went to the RFU office to pick up 3 duplicate tickets for the England v Wales rugby international, remember that word, duplicate. These were tickets which we were assured had been left in Cleakheaton, and they , therefore, gave three of my regular rugby colleagues the chance to bring three of their children.

This detour meant that I had to hot foot it to Richmond to join the drinking session a little later than planned. That went OK although the pub insists on showing football when it is full of rugby supporters. Given the match kicked off at 16:30 yesterday, I had arranged food at Zizzi's in the town centre. I booked for 13:45 thinking we could arrive about 14:00 and all would be sweetness and light. First crisis of the day, they had given our table (for 14) away aledging they had rung me to see where we were. They hadn't so we returned to the pub for more pints of foaming Pride and burger and chips 14 times!

Still we had the bus trip to the ground to look forward to, and after a fine rendition of Jeruselum, Sloop John B, Bloody Great Fishes are Wales, and others, we arrived in good time to take our seats.

Crisis number two. The three tickets left in Cleakheaton had in fact been posted by the owner to his son-in-law in High Wycombe, and he and his chums were sitting just where we had hoped to be. His father-in-law has a touch of Alzheimers, and had forgotten he had posted them on, so his problems are obviously greater than ours.

I watched the game from eight different seats as I got shuffled around the stand, and frankly after the second half, it was eight vantage points too many. Don't let any one eyed welshman cons you into believing Wales won, the stark reality is England lost. Do I really want to pay £68 to watch a product which is not up to scratch?

I should be used to it though, for years, the match has always been the low point of the day.

More disappointment followed though as Manchester United salvaged a draw with the last kick of the game against Spurs, and the Argyle crisis continued with a 1-0 defeatat home to Hull. As a point of interest these two cities, Plymouth and Hull, are the two biggest in the Country never to have experienced top flight football.

So as days go it was pretty harrowing, but all clouds have a silver lining, and following a very good sesh in the Prince Blucher, with all the right sort of company, and a few pleasant distrations, a bus came along just as we were leaving. That meant a quick call to the local takeaway meant it stayed open a few minutes late to allow the day to finish with the first food for over twelve hours.

Bread of Heaven, bah! give me Chinese of Chiswick any time!!!

Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps

Two bottles of white wine, a bottle of Vodka, two cases of Heineken a bottle of chilled champagne and three good quality pizza's. These are amongst the items populating the dressing room of Amy Winehouse as part of her 'Green Room' contract clause. Not bad for a girl in re-hab.

I have no time for Amy, but it did get me wondering what I would have in my green room if every I found myself accepting a Mercury music award, or similar.

Clearly a case of Fullers London Pride would feature, with, maybe a barrel of Doom Bar, from the Rock brewery near Newquay. I don't really do spirits, but I would probably share Amy's taste for white wine (Napa Valley Chardonnay, or Cloudy Bay Sauvignon Blanc) and Champagne. I think a finger buffet curry would take care of the eating department as fish and chips would go cold and soggy.

Then there are the add-ons, the boys toys.......Scalextic is ageless and I noticed it is celebrating its 50th anniversary, so a four lane job would need to be accommodated, with proper racing cars, not the mickey mouse ambulance/police car/family saloons they have recently introduced.

A TV showing Argyle winning at the old Wembley would be playing in the corner, and Who's Next, the album, would be blaring from the speakers. They were undoubtedly the best band I ever saw live, and while its not my all time favourite album, but it would get me in the mood for the acceptance speech!!

Now then, favourite albums, and singles, I feel another blog entry coming on....stay tuned.

The Crystal Maze

Work took me on a magical mystery tour for South London yesterday, as I travelled by train to Crawley and Three Bridges. The Northcote Road area of Clapham Junction has changed out of all recognition. While the street market still exists, and the Northcote Arms is still on the corner, its clientele now consists of yummy mummies and City types rather than poor students and bed sit dwellers. The Bank was a bank in my day, its now a gastropub, and there are the obligatory coffee shops, cheese and butchers outlets. The bakery I used to live above is now a designer breadshop. I wonder if the cockroaches still live upstairs??

On then through Balham, gateway to the South, a picture of which sits on my lounge wall to remind me of the times. We had good fun in and around Bedford Hill, and Devonshire Road. We were not quite on first name terms with the working girls, but the fact that the Bedford Arms is now owned by the Soho House group shows how that area is well up market too now. That said, you did used to be able to buy Chocolate Oliver biscuits in the old fashioned Cullens store in Balham High Road.

Thornton Heath has two great Youngs pubs, The Fountains Head and the Lord Napier, the latter is a big band and jazz pub in the Glenn Miller style. I must schedule a trip back there when Argyle play Crystal Palace.

I brought my first house in Norbury, and Tim was born in Mayday hospital just outside Croydon. I always thought it a strange name for an A & E department!

The train then swept in and out of Croydon giving me just a glimpse of the old IBM office that I first worked in and the Porter and Sorter featured previously in this blog. Croydon is still one of those places which is easy to get into but a nightmare to find your way out of. Just as well then that I was on the train.

Croydon has not changed much since I worked there thirty years ago, although it does have a tram now which goes from Wimbledon to various locations in South London. I took it once from there to Addington and walked on to Shirley Wanderers RFC for their 50th anniversary celebrations. The clubhouse was a bit like Croydon, in as much as there were the same old faces there from the mid '70s when I played regularly for them.

Rugby was a great game to play in those days, but watching the two matches at the weekend, I am beginning to think that its days are numbered. Their big chap runs into our big chap, then we do the same. Flair and enterprise seem to have disappeared.

I don't enjoy rugby league as Ii feel I am watching the same game every week, and with a few exceptions union seems to be going the same way. I do hope the rugby world cup will revitalise my enthusiasm for the game, or once again during a crackingly good social weekend, the match will become the low point.

Come on you Greens

I am a huge Plymouth Argyle supporter, having supported them since 1962, when my dad took me to the Argyle v Spurs FA Cup 4th round tie at Home Park. How my dad got tickets I don't know, but he seemed to have the ability to magic them from somewhere, be they for England at Twickenham, Wembley or Lords. Its an ability I am pleased to have inherited, and look forward to going with my eldest son to Wembley in a few weeks time for the England v Brazil game.

I remember being devastated for a Royal Marine who offered my Dad ten bob for the two tickets, in the pub one night. i was really saddened that the poor man did not have a ticket of his own. Oh the innocence of youth.

Anyway back to Argyle. Today they broke their all time transfer record by paying £400K for a Hungarian international left winger, Peter Halmosi. Their squad now consists of three Hungarians, 3 French players, a Dutchman and an Australian, as well as several Devonians, and assorted Brits. It is certainly a sign of the times.

Given that Steven Gerrard has just been awarded £120K per week in wages though, paying £400K seems a bargain.

In the 45 years I have followed the Argyle, I have seen them win at Wembley and lose in three Cup semi-finals. In league terms they have fallen from the Second division, to the Fourth division and climbed back up to the Championship as it is now called. In all that time they have never played in a league called the First division. Next season is already being anticipated with great expectation, however, the recent slump of Nottingham Forest and 'dirty' Leeds only goes to show that expectations and achievements can be a million miles apart.