So said Boris Johnson many times , although the jovial, blond haired serial shagger is still considered by most of the popular press to be lining himself up for a shot at our Dave, once the next elections are out of the way.
I have very rarely dabbled in politics, and my comparisons with Boris Johnson are fairly limited, my hair is grey for a start. It does seem, however, that this may be changing as I have recently been informed that I am Chairman elect of the Wallasey golf club seniors section. At the moment the nomination is unopposed although one is usually assured of the majority of the house when endorsed by the outgoing member, as I am.
If successful in March, I will join a line of illustrious Wallasey members, many of them ex-captains, who have held the one year office. The benefits are wide and varied. I get automatic selection to all the inter-club matches. These include Sandiway, Southport & Ainsdale, Heswall, Chester and Mere.
I get to tee off first with the opposition chairman, captain or senior golfer, the title varies from club to club, and, I get to address both teams as part of the after dinner 'entertainment'.
This speech usually consists of thanks to the host club, my playing partners and the staff. If playing away I then announce the result of the match, and finally tell a story. It's this last bit that is thwart with danger. Will it be risqué? Will the home chairman tell my story just before I stand up?should it be a joke, an anecdote or a parable? I will have eighteen such opportunities so hopefully will get the formula right by the end.
It's a huge privilege to be asked to take on the role, given I am a soft Southerner and a relatively new member of the club. I look forward to being elected, and serving the Senior section, and wider Club membership during my year in office, with humour, humility and hospitality. Can't say fairer than that, and gentlemen, that reminds me..........
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