An Ounce of Sense from Brussels

The last topic headline reminded me that I was going to comment on the decision by the faceless ones in the EU to allow the UK and Ireland to continue using their imperial measurement system. A great result for common sense, but sadly its a decision which Steve Thorburn will be unable to celebrate.

Steve was one of the original 'metric martyrs' and was charged with selling banana's by the pound. he received a conditional discharge, but died of a heart attack about three years ago. His colleagues I am sure will have raised a pint to him, and no, two half litres of lager and a packet of crisps does not have the same ring to it, does it?

I was always intrigued that the pop band 10cc got its name from the average capacity of the male ejaculation, but I don't think they would have made it big as 0.352floz. No chance the Rolling Kilogrammes lasting 40+ years either.

There are a few things I am glad we have lost though. The 400m has a much better ring to it than the 440yds, and decimalisation in 1971 certainly made adding up easier. What exactly is a twelve times table?

My favourite comment on metrication though comes from the radio series of ' I'm Sorry I'll Read That Again' . A English girl asked President de Gaulle if it was true that a 32AA bra cup would become an 81. 'Mais Oui' replied the President, ' I always make zee mountain out of zee molehill'

I'll fetch my coat!

Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps

Two bottles of white wine, a bottle of Vodka, two cases of Heineken a bottle of chilled champagne and three good quality pizza's. These are amongst the items populating the dressing room of Amy Winehouse as part of her 'Green Room' contract clause. Not bad for a girl in re-hab.

I have no time for Amy, but it did get me wondering what I would have in my green room if every I found myself accepting a Mercury music award, or similar.

Clearly a case of Fullers London Pride would feature, with, maybe a barrel of Doom Bar, from the Rock brewery near Newquay. I don't really do spirits, but I would probably share Amy's taste for white wine (Napa Valley Chardonnay, or Cloudy Bay Sauvignon Blanc) and Champagne. I think a finger buffet curry would take care of the eating department as fish and chips would go cold and soggy.

Then there are the add-ons, the boys toys.......Scalextic is ageless and I noticed it is celebrating its 50th anniversary, so a four lane job would need to be accommodated, with proper racing cars, not the mickey mouse ambulance/police car/family saloons they have recently introduced.

A TV showing Argyle winning at the old Wembley would be playing in the corner, and Who's Next, the album, would be blaring from the speakers. They were undoubtedly the best band I ever saw live, and while its not my all time favourite album, but it would get me in the mood for the acceptance speech!!

Now then, favourite albums, and singles, I feel another blog entry coming on....stay tuned.

A thousand words

Here is an interesting blogger add-on, it shows peoples photo downloads as they happen.....your own little slide show.......not sure if you need a blogger account for it to work.....

http://play.blogger.com/

Le Bateau dans Bordeaux

So The Philanderers rugby world cup tour continued at the weekend, with a fine few days in Bordeaux. Fine was the key word as the weather cracked the flags and a few glasses were raised to the outstanding performances from the teams of the Northern hemisphere......hmmmm!

The Ireland v Georgia game was a cracker with the local and neutral in the crowd cheering on the Georgians, who should have won. It was just their self belief and a sense that they weren't used to winning which ultimately cost them. England were, of course, England but the Tongan win over Samoa gave them a bit of a hand, so a quarter-final spot should still be on the cards.

But enough of the rugby. Bordeaux is an excellent place for a long weekend. It seemed bigger than Lille but had many of the attributes, good food, chic filles and plenty of wine. The city sits about eight miles up the river Gironde so it came as a shock to see a ten storey cruise ship in town the first morning. A trip to the harbour area though quickly enforces the long term use of the city as a port, not least when the German Atlantic fleet used it as a base during the Second World War. The Cockleshell Hero's, a team of Royal Marines, are remembered for their sorte up the river in canoes, when they destroyed a number of German cargo and war ships. Two of the twelve survived and returned home via Spain and Gibralter. The others were either drowned or captured and executed.

So thats the RWC embraced for the moment, next stop Paris for the semi's if L'Angleterre manage to make it!!

Lookalikes

Sir,

It has been brought to my attention that I bear an uncanny resemblance to ex-England rugby coach, Jack Rowell. This similarity was re-enforced on my recent trip to Lille, when a complete stranger engaged me in conversation and addressed me regularly as 'Jack'

I wonder if we are by any chance related?

Me and Jack


Sir,
I am concerned that I have been compared to a young Ian Botham, the ex-England cricketer and Sky Sports pundit. I wonder if by any chance he and Jack Rowell are related?

Ian and Jack

Sir,

Who is Paul Allott? Could he be their love child?

Vive La Difference

Well, a fun weekend in Northern France has just passed without too much incident. Two towns, Lille and Lens, did their best to entertain 35,000 England rugby supporters in a fairly football dominated part of the Country.

It was disappointing that the promise of large screens in the town square did not materialise, and I understand that is likely to be the same in Bordeaux this weekend. As home to Begles RFC, though, I will be expecting a bit more awareness of the needs of the travelling fans.

Not withstanding that, hundreds of French, Argentine and English fans packed ' Le Pub' in the centre of Lille old town on Friday and enjoyed an excellent start to the tournament, as the Argies provided a day 1 upset and beat Les Bleus. It proved to be the only upset of the weekend, as Wales and Scotland both overcame shaky starts to win, Ireland stuttered to victory over Namibia, and England won, but with little conviction in Lens.

Lens is a mining town which now finds itself falling on hard times.the centre is dominated by the huge marshaling yards which must have been a hive of activity during the height of the coal excavation period, a period which was ended by cheap importation from Poland and other Eastern European countries. There is little evidence of the old trade, save for a statue in the grounds of the university, and a protected area, much like Saltaire in Yorkshire, which shows the layout of the old mining community, with streets and facilities as they were many years ago.

All the bar staff and local people did their best to welcome the invading hoards, although the riot police seemed extremely disappointed that they had no Sang Anglais on their batons. Our guard of honour at the station as we left Lens for Lille in the evening was truly out of Monty Python. My colleague, Stan, took his life in his hands as he marched along the line straightening their hats, and ensuring they were carrying their rifles at correct angle before bidding then a fond farewell.

Stan it was who introduced me to the term 'Barringtons' many years ago. He was a swift drinker in those days and would go to the bar between rounds for a livener, as we were drinking far too slowly for his liking. Such action is referred to as getting a Barringtons, and is named after James Barrington-Dolby, who would provide the between rounds summary on the boxing, for the BBC. That was in the days when Eamonn Andrews used to do the commentary.

I notice that EDF are one of the main sponsors of the Rugby World Cup. After drinking all that continental lager I suspect Gaz d'France might have been a better choice. C'est la vie.

Let The Games Begin

Well, the Rugby World Cup actually, and I can't wait. Although I am somewhat disillusioned about the style of the game at the moment, there is no doubt that this tournament could be the best yet.

Firstly its in France, so its actually possible to pop over for the day to watch some of the games, secondly the All Blacks look like they might have peaked too soon again, and finally, all the groups , are primed for big games and possible upsets.

Stan and I are off to Lille tomorrow and then travelling up to Lens on Saturday for the England v USA match, one Les Blanc should win. The tournament kicks off on Friday night with France v Argentina, a potential banana skin for Les Bleu, but one I see them avoiding. My spread bet is on them at +14!

The following week there are four of us in Bordeaux for the Ireland v Georgia game. If you want a craic, then the Irish are going to provide it, and I can't wait to hear them cheering for South Africa as they play England on the Friday.

Saturday before our match we will be watching Wales v Australia where brother-in-law, David will be pitching for an upset. And upsets are potential all over the place, Ireland v France, Ireland v Argentina, England v Samoa and Scotland v Italy. Wales and Aus should make it through their groups OK.

One has to feel for Portugal having been drawn in the same group as New Zealand though, the spread for the highest scoring game is 128-132 and guess which one they have in mind?

My smart money is on there being a few red cards this time round, and with the spread 1.4-1.8, Samoa v Tonga could cover it all on their own. That really is a match I will try to see, albeit on the big screen. From Englands point of view its good they play both teams after they have played each other. They will be so beat up they just might be running on empty.

Jonny is crocked already, Ashton has done his best with limited time, and its payback time for Farrell. So its England for the semis then anything can happen!!!!!

Oh yes, I got offered tickets for the England v South Africa game yesterday, face value £170, train and match tickets and two nights hotel in Lille are costing that, so I politely declined!!!!

I Never Fancied Jackie

Mention of the Bash Street Kids reminded me of the new BBC4 programme which is about to start, Comics Britannia. What a great opportunity to re-live ones childhood through the classic titles they will feature.

Much of the programme will link the influence of the US artistic community on Comic culture, but I was never really into Batman and Wonder Woman, although there is a joke in there somewhere!!

The Scottish art house, DC Thomsons, provided most of my childhood entertainment with the ever popular Dandy and Beano characters. They were the Red Tops of their time, and featured Dennis the Menace, afore mentioned Bash Street Kids, Minnie the Minx , Roger the Dodger and the sadly missed Lord Snooty. We had a lad at school, David Finnegan, who was called Plug due to him having bucked teeth!

Desperate Dan inspired one of the longest remembered jokes; How many Cow Pies can he eat on an empty stomach? One, of course as then his stomach will not be empty....groan. He also inspired a chain of pubs to introduce the Cow Pie into its outlets well before gastropubs were the trend.

The Little Pub Company traded as Mad O'Roukes and had outlets mainly in the Black Country with such names as The Little Upton Muggery, The Little Pack Horse, The Dry Dock and the Tipton Pie Factory. Many are now in private hands but still show the particular blue glazed wall tiles which were a standard part of the decor. I have a fine collection of mugs from a number of the outlets from my days in Sandwell, deep joy.

I have been sidetracked. If Beano and Dandy were the Red Tops, then The Beezer and Topper were the broadsheets of the comic world in the 60's. Pop, Dick and Harry was the cover strip for the Beezer, and the Numskulls were a strip ahead of their time. The comics merged and eventually the titles disappeared in 1993. A character caller The Topper does exist in the Dilbert strip but I suspect that is co-incidence.

As I got older I started to read the Rover and Wizard, and The Victor and Valiant these publications merged strips with stories and introduced sporting and adventure heros like Alf Tupper, as The Tough of the Track and the great Wilson, an athlete and cricketer who played for Leasford and ate magic moss to keep him young and fit...if only I could find its source!!

Finally there was Tiger and the untouchable Roy Race, as Roy of the Rovers. His strip is still reproduced today in many football fanzines, and for a footie player to be referred to a Roy of the Rovers is still considered the ultimate accolade although in modern changing room it might be thus: Roy des robots d'exploration, Roy de los exploradores, Рой роверов or Roy van de zwervers.

Many comics died out or were absorbed into other titles during the 1990s. You can find out where yours went, here