Magical Mystery Tour

I agreed to see a friend for a few beers yesterday. We decided to meet at The Farmer's Arms in Wallasey Village in the hope that they had Fullers London Pride on draught. My friend, Steve, is a fellow exile from dan South and we play golf at the same club. The Farmer's Arms has a good range of real ale, but on this occasion the Pride was replaced by Timothy Taylor's Landlord, so we drank that....no hardship there.

Now that I have a free travel pass I decided to go there by bus. Big challenge! The Wirral bus network is very difficult to understand and is designed and run by people who , in their infancy, must have been limited to playing with train sets and buses in the confines of a very small bedroom. They must have also been tucked up very early at night.

Wirral buses seem to run in very small circles and start and end at the most obscure and inconvenient times. Take my journey last night. I needed to take two buses, the first of which conveniently stops out side the house. I needed to be at Wallasey for about 7pm, so decided to get the 6:15pm bus to Liscard where I would change.

Unbeknown to me, the 6:15 bus was actually the last bus on this route that night, but it got me to my change stop by about 6:35. I then had ten minutes to wait before my second bus arrived. This turned out to be the first bus of the day which arrived at 6:48pm and dropped me right outside the pub.

All sounds easy, until you work out that I could not get home by the same means, at a very reasonable 9:30pm. So I had to get the train back to Birkenhead and hop in a cab, so defeating the object of avoiding transport costs.

Further research indicated that the first bus was primarily a peak time bus for commuters and school children so it actually does not run after 10:00am or before 3pm. The second bus starts when the Wallasey loop bus finishes. While the loop bus runs all day, it stops at 6pm.

The ,majority of Wirral buses run in and out of the Birkenhead bus depot, either at Laird Street or Conway Park, and also call into Arrowe Park hospital. So if you are going shopping or are ill it's great. If you need to get from A to B particularly at night, its a nightmare.

We have a new bus which runs from our door to Liverpool, but guess what? The last bus back is 6:30pm, so no good if you plan a night out. The other popular bus to West Kirby (Cougarland as it's locally known) only runs every hour, so you have to be spot on to get there and back.

So it is no wonder I am having to drive much more than I used to, and when I study the bus map and find I can get to my destination, I then have to check that I can actually get back as well. Couple that with the fact the drivers are not exactly local, and I begin to realise where The Beatles got their inspiration from.