Thursday 30 August 2007

Don't dubbin the toecaps, Mum.....


I am having a Glenda Slag moment today, triggered by the latest front page expose of David Beckhams knee injury.

Ah that sweet David Beckham don't you just love his tattooed torso and stunning good looks, wizzing down the wing for England. I would love to massage his groin strain anytime...............David Beckham, what a big girls blouse, calls himself a footballer, with his metatarsal of a girlfriend and dodgy knees ( no connection there for sure) the States are welcome to him. Beckham, you Yank.(geddit!!).
Metatarsals now they are strange little bones aren't they, discovered by your average football player about 4 years ago when the bones featured in the Bash Street Kids Christmas Annual. Since then the players have been going over like nine pins. 'Desperate Dan' Rooney, Steven 'the scouse' Gerrard, Gary 'Trotsky' Neville and, oh yes, 'break it like' Beckham himself have all had damaged meta's.
Well I have the answer, give them some proper boot like I used to wear. Our Jackie Milburn, Tom Finney, Dickie Dean and Billie Wright never had such injuries, and why? Proper boots. ......... now wheres that hammer, the nails are coming through my feet again......

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